Elevate Your Keynote & Make a Bigger Impact Through Speaking -32
Get ready to transform your public speaking game in this dynamic and insightful episode of the Marli Williams Podcast! Featuring the incredible Mike Pacchione, CEO of Best Speech Co, we dive into the secrets behind crafting and delivering truly impactful keynote speeches. Discover why nailing the first 13 seconds of your talk is crucial and how finding your unique speaking style can set you apart. Mike and I discuss the power of storytelling, the art of engaging your audience, and the intriguing "TED method" that will add tension, emotion, and detail to your presentations. Ever wondered how to keep your audience hooked? Tune in as we explore practical tips for winning over any crowd and ending on a high note. If you're passionate about connecting with your audience and leaving a lasting impression, this episode is a must-listen!
Mike's Bio
Mike's Website - Best Speech
How to Win Your Audience Over in the First 13 Seconds FREEBIE!
Transcript
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Marli Williams [:Well, hey, everybody. What is happening? Welcome back to the podcast. For this week, I am hanging out with my friend Mike Pacchione, who is the CEO of Best Speech Co. And his jam in the world is helping amazing leaders create epic keynotes. So in this week's podcast, we are going to do a deep dive on really looking at what are the key components of an exceptional keynote that transforms lives and transforms the room, and we talk a lot about the power of a good opening. Not just a good opening, an epic one. And really how to win your audience over in the first 13 seconds of your keynote talk. It is a juicy episode and I cannot wait to dive into this epic conversation with you today.
Marli Williams [:Let's do this. Hey, everyone. What's happening? I am super stoked to welcome you to the Marli Williams podcast where we will explore authentic leadership, transformational facilitation, and how to create epic experiences for your audiences every single time. I am your host, Marli Williams, bringing you thought provoking insights, expert interviews, and actionable strategies to unlock your potential as a leader, facilitator, and speaker. Thank you for joining me on this journey of growth, transformation, and impact. Let's lead together. The Marli Williams podcast begins now. Let's dive in.
Marli Williams [:Hey, everybody. What is happening? I would love to welcome you back to the Marli Williams podcast, where this week I'm hanging out with my good friend, Mike Pacchione, who is the CEO of Best Speech. And his mission in the world is to really help amazing leaders and speakers give exceptional keynotes that resonate with their audience so that they can become unforgettable. Mike, welcome to the show.
Mike Pacchione [:Thank you, Marli Williams. You're the best. I love talking to other speakers. I love talking to people who want to add fun and joy to the world, and you check all those boxes. So let's get into it.
Marli Williams [:Let's do it. Yeah. It's awesome. We met both speaking at an event years ago, I think back 2017.
Mike Pacchione [:2017. Yeah.
Marli Williams [:At Think Better Live Better, which was an incredible event. We've been in touch ever since, and I've been following you and your work. And one of the things that I love about being a speaker is that there's always room for improvement. There's always, like, ways that we can do it even better. And how can we refine our message, refine our delivery? And I'm excited to learn from you today. I'm excited for you to share your magic and your message with this audience in particular. And today, we're gonna just be jamming on keynotes. And when people are going into approaching a keynote, it can be daunting.
Marli Williams [:It could be overwhelming. There's all this pressure of there's this audience that's here to hear this message, and I know that this is what you help people do. You help people craft exceptional keynotes. So when you're thinking about crafting an amazing keynote, how do you even, like, begin to approach that with your clients? Where do you start?
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. So when I'm working with someone else, there's always a preliminary, what are we talking about? What do you know already? Like, those kinds of questions. And in my own brain and in my own weird taking fashion, like some things that I'm trying to suss out are what information do they have that's new to the audience? What automatically would produce an emotional response? So like anything surprising would produce an emotional response from the audience. I don't mean emotional response like crying necessarily, but just it would get the audience to be like, Oh, I'm going to stop looking at my phone. I was surprised by that, right? So I'm always thinking about that. I'm also thinking about what's the stuff that is really valuable that sounds kind of boring to the audience? Because that's where like the magic has to really happen. We have to present that in a way that surprises the audience or is the answer to a problem or is the moral to the story something that will hit the audience in a way that's different than just saying it. So like as an example, you and I both know that as a speaker, one of the things that really matters is breathing, Just being on stage and not not being up there and just like because you hear that sometimes you hear that on stage, you'll hear people who at the end of the sentence, you can actually hear the exhale that like so you and I both know that.
Mike Pacchione [:You and I have I'm guessing you've had this happen. It's happened to me where I've done that. I'm just like talking too long without coming up for air. Mhmm. Super boring. If I were given a speech on speeches and I was like, here are the top three most important things. Like, telling people to breathe is not that's not interesting. Nobody's gonna write it down even though it matters.
Marli Williams [:Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:I've come up with a different way of, like, putting that out there.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. One of the things I think is just the idea of tone and pacing. And I remember first starting out and going to Toastmasters, Right? Like, figuring out how to deliver a message, and they do the counting and the filler words and all of these things. And the biggest lesson for me was actually slowing down because I was just trying to, like, get through it. And you have that all that adrenaline going. And what I find is sometimes people don't let the message land.
Mike Pacchione [:Yes. Big time.
Marli Williams [:And so people aren't able to really absorb what you're saying because you're just almost brushing over it or rushing through it. And so I think that breathing piece is, are you allowing yourself to breathe, and are you allowing the audience to breathe and take a breath and, like, let them idea, story, or message really land before moving on to the next piece?
Mike Pacchione [:I love it. Totally. Yes. If you were giving a speech on speeches and you presented it that way, that would be way more interesting than just saying like 0.3, breathing.
Marli Williams [:Breathing.
Mike Pacchione [:Make sure you breathe.
Marli Williams [:Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:Right? So that's the type of thing that I help people think through is how do we present this point that's important in a way that it resonates with the audience? Because in almost every speech, anybody listening, like think about what the advice is that you might be asked to give on stage that is advice that like isn't sexy, but it's super important, Right? Like, that's the stuff we need to make come alive.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. So I love this idea. How do you when you think about whatever your message is and this is really about instead of making it about what is my message, it's what do I want the audience to get Mhmm. From my message. Right? And it's like, well, why does this matter to them? Why is this relevant to them? What's in it for them versus, like, the focus on me? The focus is really on the audience. And how do I connect the dots for them to get it essentially?
Mike Pacchione [:Big time. Yeah. But do you know Glo Atanmo? Is that someone you know?
Marli Williams [:Mm-mm.
Mike Pacchione [:Oh, man. You would love her. Okay.
Marli Williams [:I think I've heard of her, but I don't know her.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. Homework for Marli is to watch a glow at hand, though, keynote. I watched glow speak a couple of years ago, and And I'm just sitting in the back of the room and she did something that is what I like, my actual goal for a keynote is for the audience to forget it's a keynote. Like, I want them to feel as if and this actually is how I felt on stage when I watched you for the first time. And this is when I was like, oh, me and Marli are gonna be friends. Because I want them to feel like it's just a friend who's on stage. And maybe I've never met this person before, but like she's really thought through all this stuff and she's funny and she's not intimidated by the moment and this, this, this, this. I bring up Glo because she was phenomenal.
Mike Pacchione [:And I even I remember I was taking notes and I wrote down on my little iPad in the back, like sitting back of the room and I wrote down, this is so good. I'm just writing things like that. Like, this is so good. I can't believe how good this is. I'm not taking notes on our content at all. And afterwards, I talked to her. And I was surprised to find out that she used to hate speaking and be scared of it. And the flip for her was what you just said, which is when when she started thinking of it as a service to the audience, that's when everything changed for her.
Mike Pacchione [:But she used to have the awkward, I'm in the front of the room, and I'm really nervous, and talking or everybody's looking at me. She doesn't have that anymore.
Marli Williams [:Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:I'm sure that still happens from time to time, but the flip about making about the audience made all the difference for her.
Marli Williams [:A 100%. Yeah. 1 of 1 of my speaking mantras is when I do get a little bit nervous, which I think is normal, there's a Mark Twain quote. I think he says there are 2 types of speakers, nervous ones and liars. And so I think it's like a little bit of nervous is is good.
Mike Pacchione [:Good nervous.
Marli Williams [:And how do I harness that? And one of the things that I tell myself before I get on any stage is just to show up and serve, show up and serve, show up, play full out, give it all I have, and serve the audience. And to trust that is that's my intention when I get on a stage versus our ego wants 2 things. We wanna look good and get it right.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah.
Marli Williams [:And that's when we focus on the perfection and not wanting to make a mistake and all these things where when you watch someone on stage and they might fumble, but it's like how that person handles it. Like, do they lose it? Or I've also seen people, like, give the perfect talk if you were like textbook, but there was no personality, no energy. I wanna feel you and like this idea of rapport and resonance with your audience of we're just on we're just here to have a powerful conversation about leadership. Or, you know, this is like a pep talk from my heart to your heart. And what is kinda like the energy that comes through the words? And it's not about the words. I mean, the words are important and the energy behind them and that I love quotes and it's hard. It's like that people won't remember what you said or what you did, but they'll never forget the way you made them feel. And so it's like, how do you want the audience to feel when you're in the room with them? Like, this is the only thing that's happening right now.
Marli Williams [:Like, again, that moment where people wanna put down their phones where it's compelling, it's captivating, it's dynamic, it's interesting. And so I really love unpacking, like, this idea of, well, what makes a great keynote? What are the components? What are the factors? What are the ingredients when you're watching someone speak or when you're helping someone craft a keynote that we really want to amplify and elevate and make sure that we hit the mark, so to speak. You know?
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. Big time. The one that I feel like I help people the most with is the beginning of the talk, and I have a freebie after that Williams people can download afterwards or I guess you're listening, you can download it right now. But I've got a whole thing about how to start the talk. And it's interesting because you and I have both seen this where people get on stage and, like, public speaking is awkward. Like, it's weird to be on a stage and get announced and, like, the spotlight's on you. And then it's just like, here, talk. Really, nothing like that in the rest of life.
Mike Pacchione [:And so the effect of that is a lot of people get on stage and they hem and haw and they talk about like, wow, Portland. Oh, man. I went to Voodoo Donuts last night, which you and I both know better donut options in Portland. But, you know, like, so there's a lot of like, well, did you have the roast beef and, like, just kind of putzing around to find your own footing. I get why it happens. That actually is especially for people who have anxiety speaking, that's making it a lot worse because the audience the audience is actually waiting for you to go. So to me, like, I don't know if I wanna rank it number 1 overall, but having a planned out beginning of the talk, first line that hits being able to walk out there, hit the middle of the stage, and just deliver and just start. That's like the biggest one for me because what it does is it communicates to the audience like I'm ready, which they want.
Mike Pacchione [:At least if you do it well, they like you right off the bat. So think about that. My freebie is when the audience over like, how to win the audience over the first 13 seconds and the different techniques for that. You went over in 13 seconds, the remaining, like, 44 minutes, 47 seconds, like, it's so much easier.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. It's so true. So this idea of the first 13 seconds and really having a strong and powerful opening from what are the words, but what is your energy?
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. Mhmm.
Marli Williams [:And like you said, when you're walking up on stage, are you starting your talk as you're walking, or are you letting yourself, like you said, get to the middle of the stage, land, take in the audience, and boom, like, drop some sort of, like, golden nugget, powerful statement. And I love your freebie because there's, like, 6 really specific, like, here's how to do that and here's different ways to approach it. And sometimes it's trying things out too of, like, being willing to experiment of, like, okay. I'm gonna try this and see how that goes. And I've had to really, over the years, figure out, well, what's my unique brand of magic? Like, finding my own way of doing that. And it's really easy when you look at great speakers of like, oh, I wanna do it just like them.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah.
Marli Williams [:And that may or may not be like, what's your own personal style? What's your brand of magic? Like, what are you a storyteller? Are you a facilitator? Like, I really love the like, who here moment, like, I want to get the audience to like, connect and buy into the idea right out the gate and for them to move their body and say yes to me and say yes to, like, whatever we're here for. Right? Like, raise your hand if you came here to meet interesting, inspiring people. Awesome. In the next 30 minutes, I'm gonna give you an opportunity or whatever.
Mike Pacchione [:Like Oh, man.
Marli Williams [:Again, that's one way of Yeah. Kind of like I mean, when I think about it, it's like, how am I enrolling the audience through my message, through my energy, and saying, like, this matters, and this is what we're here for. And so I think this idea of that a powerful opening is just so important. And I think, yeah, being willing to explore and experiment and try some of these ideas out that you have in your freebie.
Mike Pacchione [:So Man, you just hit on something that I wish we'd had this conversation, like, 90 minutes ago because I was giving feedback. So right after this, I'm going to the airport and I'm going to Craft and Commerce in Boise, which is, the ConvertKit annual conference. And one of the speakers there that's going to do a fantastic job is named Chenell Basilio. So I did the coaching for that conference, and she sent me, like, a loom of her talk. And the whole thing's really, really good, except the beginning. I was like, this feels like a 5 and everything else is a 9 or a 10.
Marli Williams [:Mhmm. And I
Mike Pacchione [:was giving her a suggestion. And what I wish I had said was Chenell, this style doesn't feel like you. Like that actually, Marli, what you just said is what it should have been. Mhmm. And her introduction is gonna get like, I gave her a suggestion. She's gonna do just fine with that, but that's actually what it was because and I was sitting there and I'm thinking to myself, a lot of times I want people to start with, like, this big creative hook, a long story. That doesn't seem like Chenell. Chenell is very much like a a worker, a data person.
Mike Pacchione [:She spends 20 hours a week researching someone and how they grew their email list. That's why she needs to just start with data because that's who she is. So it's still to be data in service of the audience. But to your point, there is a certain amount of who am I and what are my strengths and what feels comfortable to me because it's in service to the audience. But if I'm a fish out of water up there, I am going to creator. So, yeah, like experiment, figure out your style.
Marli Williams [:And I appreciate that because I have seen literally like webinars and ads that say, like, these are the first ten words to open any talk or any keynote or whatever. It's like, I love this idea of here's some ideas. Here's some ways to think about the opening. And one of them was like, oh, I forget what he said. It was like, I knew it was over when or, like, I was sick and tired of, like, that kind of, like, rock bottom moments story or whatever. And it's just like, I remember when I was first starting out as a speaker, one of my mental blocks was I don't have this, like, sob story of, like, I hit rock bottom and then I found it, my light or whatever. You know?
Mike Pacchione [:My life has been pretty good. Like
Marli Williams [:And one of my lines that I've said I don't say it at every talk. It depends on what the message is, but I'm like, you don't have to wait for your life to suck to wanna change it.
Mike Pacchione [:Oh, what a line.
Marli Williams [:You don't have to wait for your life to suck to want to change it. You get to decide right now, like good as the enemy of great. If you want a great life, like you want an epic life, like, fuck. You know, I don't wanna swear, but it's like, fuck fine. I want freaking amazing. You're allowed to want more. You're allowed, you know, and want what you want and all these things. And so I think that this idea of who the hell am I to be on a stage and to give a talk and the stories that we make up about who's allowed on stage or, oh, what I was gonna say was one of the pieces of feedback I got from an audience member one time was, like, I'm so glad that this wasn't one of those, like, rock bottom moment stories or and bless their hearts.
Marli Williams [:Like, I climbed Mount Everest. Like, there are people in the audience, like, I am never going to climb Mount Everest. Like, that's just not my journey in the world. You know? And I get it's a metaphor, and I talk about, you know, nature and that kind of thing. But if you don't make it resonate with the audience, again, you could just be up there being like, I climb Mount Everest or, like, this terrible thing happened to me. And, like, you can do it too champ or whatever.
Mike Pacchione [:Well, and honestly, a lot of those that are the most impressive stories of climbing Everest or a shark bit off my arm and I made it to shore anyway and that, that, that. Those serve a great purpose for 1 hour and then don't do that much for the audience a lot of the time. So there is a tremendous amount of power in I don't know. You and I aren't, like, regular, but kind of. Right? There there is there is power in a more relatable story.
Marli Williams [:Right. And I think I'm more of a tangible, practical, like, I want So it's like when I think about what makes a great keynote is that whatever message or idea they learned in the next 45 minutes to an hour, he has the possibility of shifting something in their life
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah.
Marli Williams [:That they can apply immediately and directly. But, like, that's important to me of and I talk a lot about what the difference between a transactional presentation and a transformational one. A transactional one one is like it's one directional. You know, like on stage, you are speaking to the audience, but it's very much like about, like, what I have to share with you. And it to me, it's a flat. It falls flat. It's like, that was great. Moving on.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. Yeah.
Marli Williams [:But a transformational one, it's like it's something that keeps generating throughout the conference. People talk about it. People do something different. And one of the things that I do in my talks that I know not everyone does or is comfortable doing is I you know, it's one thing to talk about gratitude. Right? I might talk about how to confidently connect with people and how to build relationships, but also how to nurture them. Great. We can talk about this and or we can be about this. And so I'm gonna invite everybody to get out their phones.
Marli Williams [:Don't worry. I've started the text message for you. It's like, hey there. I was just thinking about you. Appreciate or acknowledge this about you, or I wanna say thank you for this. And so it's like, why I want you to take a moment to think about someone in your life, in your work that you genuinely want to express appreciation for. And we are gonna take 60 seconds for 500 of us to send 500 messages of gratitude, 60 seconds. Go.
Marli Williams [:Right? And then people do it. And because I've done this enough times, I say, if you got the message back, are you okay? I feel deeply concerned about the quality of your relationships. Because if people are genuinely concerned if you're okay because you expressed a genuine gratitude or appreciation, that's a little bit of a red flag. You know? So all that to say is, for me, that could be a transformational moment for someone to be like, oh. And it's like I'm calling people out, but I'm calling people up. And I can do it in a funny playful way, but it could also be like, oh, I'm not appreciating the people in my life.
Mike Pacchione [:Oh.
Marli Williams [:Wow. That's a moment. Like, that could be a moment for someone. But I on the surface, a transactional moment, be like, gratitude's great. Make a gratitude list. Write down 3 things you're grateful for every day. And that's my speaking style. And it might not be for everyone to do something like that, which I totally get.
Mike Pacchione [:Well, because I can picture the way you deliver this, and this is where the speaking style is really important because Marli is at that point in the talk, they like you already. I mean, that's not the first thing you're doing, I assume.
Marli Williams [:No. It is not the first thing. Not the first thing out the gate. I make them dance first, which I know is not everyone's thing either.
Mike Pacchione [:That's not my thing. But at that point in the talk, they like you already, and your presence on stage is friendly and welcoming. So the way that you deliver that line about, like, I'm concerned about your relationships, certain people would deliver that poorly and it would sound
Marli Williams [:Condescending.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. Condescending. Exactly.
Marli Williams [:Like shaming people versus, like, there's a way to do that that makes people think but not feel bad about themselves.
Mike Pacchione [:Well, that's why you have to win the audience over or it doesn't work.
Marli Williams [:Yes. And that this again, going back to this first 13 seconds of, like, how do you win the audience over in that moment of, like, you're building that know, like, and trust factor the minute you walk on stage.
Mike Pacchione [:Yes. Yeah.
Marli Williams [:Through your energy, your presence, your tone, your words, and, like, really allowing people into your world. So that way, it's that, you know, people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. Like, how do you communicate that with your audience? And again, I think it's finding your own way of doing it and not trying to do it like somebody else.
Mike Pacchione [:Yes.
Marli Williams [:But I think it's being intentional and doing it on purpose. And when people get on stage and they're fumbling around and spending 10 minutes to, like, get the to the point, when I talk with my facilitators and I'm teaching them how to facilitate workshops and retreats, I talk this idea of land the plane. And how long is a good story? I mean, you could tell a great story in 2 minutes
Mike Pacchione [:Oh, less.
Marli Williams [:Versus 20. You know, it's like and what are the key ingredients of a great story? And I would love to know because you are a great storyteller, and I think that that is one of the things that people come to you for of how do you tell a great story in a short amount of time and connect it to the overall message? I mean, this is like coaching for me because I have the big ideas, but I don't always I wanna be better. I know that one of my areas of growth is like, how do I illustrate this through a story? Because I know that those are the moments that can be really memorable. And how do you make it sticky?
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah.
Marli Williams [:Right? What are those sticky memorable stories and moments to help the message land?
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. So first of all, a story does not need to be long. I think a lot of people hear a story about like 5 minutes. The most popular TED talk, sir Ken Robinson. There are two stories he tells back to back and I have seen them used a hundred times in different conferences. I used to work for a company where like every single workshop we would play that clip in the first 10 minutes. And what that really was, was a way of winning over the audience was having sir Ken Robinson win them over ironically. So he tells the story of a girl with a drawing lesson, and it's immediately followed by his son.
Mike Pacchione [:What is like a Christmas pageant called? Why am I blanking on this?
Marli Williams [:Oh, nativity play. Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:Nativity play. Both stories are hilarious. Combined, they take less than a minute. They don't have to be long, I think is the first thing for people to know. And actually, if you were telling a story over and over again, like different speeches, one of the things that gets really fun, it's probably not going to sound fun now. One of the things that gets really fun is figuring out how can I cut a sentence? How can I pause a little longer here? I mean, it's like we all get to be amateur standup comedians.
Marli Williams [:The timing. Josh
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah, totally. And the stories don't all have to be funny, to be clear. But I just mean being able to work through how to perfect it is super, super fun. So there's a lot to talk about. I would say there are 3 things that are good starting points for telling a story. First is tension being able to ramp up the tension. If you think of it like stand up comedy, it's build, build, build punchline. Now, again, not every story is funny, but we want the audience feeling like, what next? What next? Mhmm.
Mike Pacchione [:There is a version that goes too long. And I think my my my best way of giving you a time on that is if you're telling this story to a regular person, if they have to say uh-huh more than once, story is probably too long. Right?
Marli Williams [:Story is too long.
Mike Pacchione [:Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Like that that story is probably too long, but building up the tension is a big one. One thing that you can do there and I always suggest to people is for the key part of the story. I know your English teacher back in 8th grade told you maintain the same tense the entire time. Switch to present tense for the key part. So that moment of key dialogue, it's she says, I say, instead of said said. It makes the audience feel like they're actually there.
Mike Pacchione [:So that's one trick for tension. Yeah. And the second thing I would say is think through the ending. When you're telling a story, when I'm telling a story at dinner or wherever, I naturally will take the story to the end of the little block in my brain. But here's the problem. From stage, a lot of times you're taking the audience beyond when they would have the biggest emotional reaction. I tell this one story. Gosh, it's too long for me to tell right now, but short version is I once had a guy who tried to break into my hotel I guess not break into my hotel room.
Mike Pacchione [:He called me and wanted to get into my hotel room in the middle of the night. And it's pretty freaking scary.
Marli Williams [:Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:But the end of it is just I switched rooms, and nothing happens. So from a human being standpoint, you would rather that. But from a storytelling standpoint, like, it's not it's like, oh.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. Oh, so
Mike Pacchione [:you just got to bed and night to sleep?
Marli Williams [:Right. It's like, okay. Moving on.
Mike Pacchione [:So the story actually needs to end earlier, which is hard. And that is almost impossible to do if you're not running through this story before you ever get on stage. You'll almost definitely take it too far. The third thing that I would say is the use of detail. Now, you and I have both been around people who give too much detail. And you're you're saying and I had roast beef. I put the mustard on it, not the spicy kind, and then we went to the beach. Right? Like
Marli Williams [:Yeah. The wrong type of details.
Mike Pacchione [:The wrong type of details. Yeah.
Marli Williams [:So it's figuring out, well, how do you figure out what's important and what's not?
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. So it's usually just, like, 1 or 2 vivid details in the key part of the talk. So tension, emotion, or ending, however you wanna think of that, and then detail, which spells TED, which I only realized after delivering this several times and giving it like t e d. I was like, wait a minute. She just switched these too.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. Tension emotion detail. Is that right? Yeah. Yeah. I like that. One of the things that I've seen people do that I have not yet perfected, but I would like, oh, when I see it and it's done well, I'm like, it's so good. When someone starts their talk with a story, they're able to pause and, like, somehow say, we'll come back to it or Yeah. Whatever.
Marli Williams [:Give their whole talk and then come back like, the comeback? Yes. So remember at the beginning when dah dah dah dah dah Yeah. Boom. This is the thing. You know, that bookend story, like, done well within a talk and a message and a point, like, I'm like, I am here for it. And it takes yeah. Like, how to craft that and do it really well. And and I think the other thing that great speakers do that I've had to work on and I'm still working on is transitions.
Mike Pacchione [:Mhmm.
Marli Williams [:Transitions from whether that's like that opening story into the first point, into the second point, into the third point, into the closing story. And like, how do I intentionally, again, take people on what's the journey that I'm taking people on through this adventure, you know, so to speak. It's like, okay. I have 45 minutes having that kind of like emotional roller coaster, if you will, like kind of the ups and downs you don't want. It's like listening to a song. That's just one note.
Mike Pacchione [:Oh my gosh, yes.
Marli Williams [:Versus like, okay, we're like on this ride. There's like things are happening, things are going, I'm with you.
Mike Pacchione [:I just had this conversation because I love music, but I don't know enough about it. And I explained my whole thought of what a speech should be because it shouldn't be one. A story shouldn't be OneNote. A speech shouldn't be OneNote. It needs to have undulations, but it needs to start fast and it needs to end with some level of optimism unless you're trying to scare your audience for some reason. Right?
Marli Williams [:Right.
Mike Pacchione [:And, I think the song to think about is from Hamilton. I don't know if it's actually called this, but the like, I'm not gonna miss my shot. I don't know what this song is.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. I know the one.
Mike Pacchione [:I think that's what a speech should be like, that song.
Marli Williams [:Why?
Mike Pacchione [:Because most songs start kind of slow and my son's almost 5 and sometimes I, like, press play. He's like, turn the music on. I'm like, buddy, it just starts like it takes a few seconds. Right? But that song just starts, but it doesn't just stay, you know, like at an 8 the whole time. Right. Like, it goes back and forth at least somewhat, and then it it ends going up as well.
Marli Williams [:I wanna go listen to that song now.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. I think that's it. I'm gonna have to, like, really think through that a little more, but if
Marli Williams [:I like it.
Mike Pacchione [:Now, that's what I'm saying.
Marli Williams [:I'm here for it. So when you think I know you focus a lot on the opening.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah.
Marli Williams [:When do you think about a powerful closing? Yeah. How do you help people land the plane? As far as, like I mean, I have some thoughts about what I do and what's important to me, but I'm curious how you help people close power like, open powerfully, have a point, and close on purpose and not just be like, okay, my time's up.
Mike Pacchione [:Which is what must be of test. Yes. Oh, that was the last slide. Questions?
Marli Williams [:Yeah. Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:First of all, in writing this stuff, intro and outro gets its own day. So most people write sequentially. I'm gonna write the first thing, second thing, third thing. And if that's how your brain works, I guess do that. But I found it's better to write the middle first and figure out what you're talking about. The intro needs to be setting that up. So the intro comes after the middle and then the after is the last thing. And usually I wanna have a whole like hour to figure that out.
Mike Pacchione [:It doesn't always need to be an hour, but here's the thing, right? Like most famous ending ever, at least in America, Martin Luther King, free of last, free of last. Thank God Almighty, we're free of last. Metaphorically speaking, the way that most people would deliver that it's like free at last free at last. Thank God all might. No no. They would say free at last free at last. Thank God Almighty we are free at last. But right now we're not free.
Mike Pacchione [:Does anybody have any questions Or maybe, like, not even that much. Right? Like, it would just be and that's it.
Marli Williams [:Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:We need to build to, like, a last line that is obvious, like, that was the end. And you're not literally dropping a mic, but it should feel a little like that. Now, not every speech you have to calibrate the ending to, like, the emotion you're going for. Not everything needs free at last, free at last, but almost always we're trying to leave the audience on an upswing again. Going back to stand up comedy comedians will talk about like I want to end on my last joke and it's because it's the last thing to hear. It's what they're most likely to remember.
Marli Williams [:Right.
Mike Pacchione [:You want them walking out or signing off the Zoom on a high note.
Marli Williams [:So what other than that one, what's the best closing you've heard or you've helped someone write as that, like, final? I know. Not exactly, but, like, the mic drop moments because I think examples are really helpful.
Mike Pacchione [:When I helped Amy Porterfield a few years ago, she was speaking at a conference that was almost all women, which informs the example a little bit. But she's going through a thing about building a business and email lists and all the great business things that Amy usually does. And I was like, Amy, what's the real holdup for people? So some of it's clarity, a lot of it was self worth and just feeling like they couldn't do it, like, for that audience.
Marli Williams [:Like, confidence. Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. I'm like, okay. So you're telling me these are women who are mostly, like, twenties, thirties, forties, many of whom it's safe to assume would have birth children and like they can birth a child, but figuring out how to read these analytics, that's where I drew the line. Right? So you can't watch this online or anything, but we built a whole ending around that that was challenging the audience and saying, so you're able to birth the child, but you can't do this or this or this. I think you can. And challenging the audience is something that I love to do as an ending, especially when you know that they actually can do it.
Marli Williams [:So good. I love that. Yeah. This goes back to my my speaker style is, like, is facilitator. Yeah.
Mike Pacchione [:Like, I
Marli Williams [:will claim that. And at the end, I talk about this idea of the one degree shift and that we don't have to change everything for everything to change. And when you change your course, the metaphor of, like, you're on a sailboat, that's the metaphor I use. There's lots of other like, there's, like, planes. There's other things. But if you change your course just one degree over the course of 100 of thousands of miles, you can end up in a completely different place. So I want to give you permission right now in this moment that you don't have to change everything. But what is the smallest change that you can make that's gonna make the biggest difference? And I have still quotes on their tables, and I have them take 60 seconds.
Marli Williams [:They write it down. They share it with a partner. And then when I have time, I invite some people on stage to share or in the audience, I'll have pass the mic around. Like, I'm gonna play with my kids more. Like, it's like, what are the things you're gonna do differently when you leave here? Because if we leave here, this is one of my other lines, if we leave here and nothing changes, we've missed the whole point.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. What was the point?
Marli Williams [:What's the point?
Mike Pacchione [:It was a fun hour.
Marli Williams [:So one of my big values as a facilitator and this coming back to the difference between transactional and transformational is I think we assume the audience is gonna go home and reflect and write in their journal and set their goals. And it's like, I assume not like they're onto lunch. They're onto the next thing. They're in their email. They're doing the taking their kids to soccer practice. Like, so how can I give them these moments of reflection and connection to the message? And actually, like, there's something very powerful and kinesthetic about writing something down and about sharing it with somebody else and being witness and then even more powerful, like getting on a mic and saying it out loud. And this kind of like declaration to this is what I'm gonna do differently when I walk out of this room or like, what's the one next step. What's the one bold move.
Marli Williams [:What's the one action. What's the biggest takeaway. Like what's the thing you're gonna leave here with and do. Like, I sometimes have people put something in their calendar a week from today. Like, did you do the thing? Whatever it is. So for me, that's where I end typically.
Mike Pacchione [:Your next step balanced with inspiration. Awesome. Love.
Marli Williams [:One of the prompts that I've learned from a speaker coach I used to work with is, you know, my wish for you is or my hope for you is is that you leave here and you, again, do the thing that you said you were gonna do. Like or my hope for you is that what are you leaving pea again, leaving people on that high note and saying, like, you can freaking do this thing. Yeah. Whatever it is. Kinda like, you got this. I see you. I believe in you. Like, turn your and sometimes I'll say, like, depending on the audience, but, like, turn your neighbor and give them a big high five and say, let's do this on the count of 123 and seen or something like that.
Marli Williams [:So it's like I'm leaving on this, like, crescendo.
Mike Pacchione [:Love it.
Marli Williams [:That's my style.
Mike Pacchione [:No. But that's the thing. Right? Like, crescendo is a good word for it. Like, we want them on the upswing walking out. And then one other thing I would add to that, actually, this depends a little bit on the venue, but as long as it's not like 5,000 people in the audience, I always recommend ending early so that people can come talk to you. Because nobody complains about it ending early. I mean, nobody's like, Marli, supposed to be here till 1, 12:57. Nobody complains about that.
Mike Pacchione [:But also so you're giving people time back and also, like, some people wanna come talk to you. They wanna ask questions. They wanna connect with you. That's tough when you end right at 1 o'clock and then they have to go back to work.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. And definitely don't go over because that messes everything up.
Mike Pacchione [:Mhmm.
Marli Williams [:So as we talking about closing, wrapping things up for today, I would love for you to share any final thoughts you have with our audience. They're going out there. They're wanting to deliver powerful keynote presentations and speeches. What advice would you leave them with and where can they find you? And obviously, we'll put the link to the freebie in the show notes and all that good stuff. But Yeah. Final thoughts to leave
Mike Pacchione [:Final thoughts.
Marli Williams [:Our audience with today.
Mike Pacchione [:I think the greatest compliment that I've received was from a CMO who said so much in the public speaking world is based on fear. And, Mike, you bring joy to speaking. And, like, that stuff actually is possible. Marli, I know you experienced that. It just there's some people hate speaking. It's like their least favorite thing that they have to do. It is possible to enjoy it, but it's really hard to enjoy it if the first time that you were delivering the talk is when you were in front of an audience. The trick that people don't know about is behind the scenes, most people are at least most good speakers are rehearsing it more than once.
Mike Pacchione [:It might not be a 45 minute straight rehearsal. It might be rehearsing a part here, a part here, a part here. So pretty pleased with Sugar on top rehearse. And my suggestion for you because rehearsing is awkward. My suggestion for you, I found very helpful. And I would say about 80% of people do. So you might not, but most people do. Rehearse with music on.
Mike Pacchione [:It just removes some of the awkwardness of standing in a room and fumbling through a script. And can someone else hear me?
Marli Williams [:Would you say with that music without words or music with words?
Mike Pacchione [:I love music with words. Like, to me, I put on my pump up mix, like, same thing I use for running. That's what I Wow. Yeah. Some people that'll that'll mess with you, so music without words. We just remove some of the Yeah. I'm in a room, and I am talking about so rehearse
Marli Williams [:in general. Mhmm.
Mike Pacchione [:Rehearse with music. If you can do that, you're establishing the muscle memory of I have energy walking on stage. Yep. It helps win over the audience and speaking just gets so much easier from there.
Marli Williams [:I love that so much. Yeah. And I think that this idea that I want people to really get from our conversation today is like making those first 13 seconds count.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. And if
Marli Williams [:you don't rehearse anything else, know what you're gonna say when you walk on stage and practice that over and over and over. Because I know as a speaker, I think like the first one to 2 minutes are the hardest part, like, of a talk because you're just like, whew, like, the nerves are going, like, you walk on stage. And so if you have that dialed, I think it can help just like build and boost your own confidence. And again, those 13 seconds where you're building that trust and rapport with the audience and having that just nailed and dialed in, and then know how you're going to end.
Mike Pacchione [:Yes.
Marli Williams [:And as you're crafting your talk, I always think about like, what is the true north? When people walk out of this room, what are they thinking? What are they feeling? And what are they doing differently when they walked in? And if at any point you're like, I don't know what to say, or I don't know what the message is. It's like, begin with the end in mind. Like, where do I want to take people? What is the journey? And then work backwards from there. And again, instead of that ego trying to look good and get it right, focusing on how can this serve the audience. And that is the whole point, bringing it full circle. Like, the point of a keynote is to share an idea that can transform someone's life in 45 minutes. And I'll reiterate, like, finding your own unique magical brand and style of your speaking, your facilitation, and how you wanna show up. And that happens through exploration and experimentation.
Marli Williams [:And I think one of my first speaking coaches said he's like, Marli, your first 101 100 talks are gonna suck.
Mike Pacchione [:He said is a lot.
Marli Williams [:That's a lot. The whole point was that they're he's like, they're probably not gonna suck to the audience, but they're gonna suck suck to you because, you know, like your expectations of yourself are like, I know what's possible, but the only way to get better is by being in the arena.
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah.
Marli Williams [:You know, like we can read books on speaking and we can practice, but, like, getting on a stage in front of a live audience is the only way, like, built again, building that courage and building that muscle memory. And so they probably all didn't suck, but it was like, am I willing to show up and learn and grow through that experience and let go of the perfection, but really making sure that I am showing up in service of the audience.
Mike Pacchione [:And that's the thing people don't get about being on stage too, is sometimes you're seeing a speaker who's done this for a long time. And even with me, like sometimes people will say, Wow, you worked with so and so. But they kind of get the order wrong. But part of the reason why this is not like the reason, but part of the reason why like Amy and like Pat Flynn and some of the people I've worked with their brands are so big is because they got on stages. So I just think that's relevant. It's a great way of building a brand. It's a great way of having fun. It's a great way of connecting with your audience.
Mike Pacchione [:It's I just love speaking so much.
Marli Williams [:Yeah. It's fun. If you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong. That's what we like to say around here.
Mike Pacchione [:That's what I feel. Yeah.
Marli Williams [:Where can people find you and learn about your work in the world and all the fun things?
Mike Pacchione [:Yeah. Totally. So it's bestspeech.co. So bestspeech.co. And we'll Marli and I have talked about my freebie, which is so great. Like, I really honestly, like candidly, it's worth 1,000 of dollars. I get emails from people who are just like, this totally changed the game for me. So we'll do a special one here for anybody who wants it.
Mike Pacchione [:So best speech.co/marli, and Marli has an I on the end in case you're not, like, looking at how to spell it, m a r l i.
Marli Williams [:We got it. Speech.co/marli. Beautiful. Amazing. It's an awesome resource. Definitely check it out. Thank you so much, Mike, for being here. Thank you all for tuning in.
Marli Williams [:If this landed for you, resonated with you, love for you to share your golden nuggets, your takeaways, and your one degree shifts with me. What are you gonna do differently the next time you approach your keynote? What are your first 13 seconds gonna be? And share this with a friend who this could resonate with as well. So thanks for tuning in. Can't wait to see you next week. Peace. Thank you for joining us on another inspiring episode of the Marli Williams podcast. We hope you're leaving here with renewed energy and valuable insights to fuel your leadership, coaching, and speaking endeavors. I'd love to invite you to subscribe, rate, and review this podcast to help us reach more aspiring leaders and speakers like you.
Marli Williams [:We have more exciting episodes and remarkable guests lined up, so make sure to tune in next time. Until then, keep leading with purpose, coaching with heart, and speaking with conviction. This is Marli Williams signing off. See you next week.
