How to Own the Hell Out of Your Voice And Why it Matters -20

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Marli Williams [: 00:00:00

Well, hey, everybody. What is happening? I am super stoked to welcome you back to the Marli Williams podcast, where this week I am hanging out with Bonnie Weeks, who is the founder of Flow School. She is a phenomenal yoga teacher and mentor for yoga teachers, and she really helps people own the hell out of their voice. And that is what we are going to talk about and explore today and really helping empower you to own your voice so that you can share your message and your mission with more people in whatever capacity that you lead in your life. So cannot wait to dive into this powerful conversation with Bonnie today. Let's do this. Hey, everyone. What's happening? I am super stoked to welcome you to the Marli Williams podcast, where we will explore authentic leadership, transformational facilitation, and how to create epic experiences for your audiences every single time.

Marli Williams [: 00:01:03

I am your host, Marli Williams, bringing you thought provoking insights, expert interviews, and actionable strategies to unlock your potential as a leader, facilitator, and speaker. Thank you for joining me on this journey of growth, transformation, and impact. Let's lead together. The Marli Williams Podcast begins now. Let's dive in. Alright, everybody. I would love to welcome you back to the Marli Williams podcast where this week, I'm hanging out with Bonnie Weeks, who is a phenomenal yoga teacher, mentor, coach, trainer, entrepreneur, all the things. So thanks for being with us, Bonnie.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:01:48

Absolutely. I'm stoked about it.

Marli Williams [: 00:01:50

Well, I just said a little bit of what you do. But since you are new to this audience, new to the crew, I'd love to give you a moment for you to share what you are up to in the world and, you know, anything that has kind of brought you to this this moment in time, and then we'll we'll dive into our conversation today. I'm super stoked.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:02:10

Yeah. K. I love it. As we're here to talk a lot about leadership, I think that's where, you know, we're really coinciding or coming together in this moment. And I was just thinking on this the other day where in August, it will be 4 years that I have been leading something I created called Flow School for yoga teachers. And so I'm in my 13th round currently of that. Next week will be round 14. I have this mixture of online and in person where we really dive into the nuance and specifics of sequencing and queuing, where people are like, I can create the thing, or I'm moving in interesting ways, but how do I help students do this? And and what does it mean? And how do I lead a room? And all the things that we might face as individuals when we step into leadership positions.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:02:57

And coupled with movement and play and finding freedom and finding entrepreneurship then in business building, it becomes this whole playground. So I was just thinking how wild it is, how fast time goes, and also how it's so slow sometimes. I'm like, wow. 4 years. And how I still feel like, oh, now I'm beginning. Oh, now we're doing the thing. Because you can't do something for so long too and not get better at it. And so I think constantly, I I am refining how I'm showing up.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:03:33

So that's a big piece of what I'm currently doing is working a lot with yoga teachers. It's not a 200 hour training, which is kind of standard for teachers kind of stepping into the teaching zone, but it's the specifics of sequencing and queuing and really leading the room, and in a way that is quite atypical in yoga land. So that's like a part. I have some fun projects in the works, that are are exciting. I have a book that I'm working on for teachers. I have some stuff for studio owners that I'm working on. I love to talk about how to help people own the hell out of their voice. So there's kind of a realm for that.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:04:11

I teach online. I have something called Studio B where people can practice yoga and workout with me. I'm big into strength training and yoga, and I have a podcast called Yoga Strong that I've been doing for over 4 years now. And then I guess I would say, like, the side party time where I think it's so important as leaders to show up in spaces where there's no demand, where it's just play time. Because we can have a long list that is basically never ending, especially as entrepreneurs and solopreneurs of all the things we need to do. And so I was like, where are we playing? So my play land right now, which is it feels important for me to share too, is I have a podcast called sexy Sunday. I like to write sexy poetry and play with photography and create opportunities to kind of talk about body celebration. But all of it ends up being where I show up and what I'm doing.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:05:08

So I think that side, it feels important to share because especially because in the online land, it's all out there. And I think the gift of right now too is that the people who choose to learn from me or to work alongside me, they know so many things about me that I have nothing to hide. I feel free because I have done, like, the scary things and, like, talked about the things. So that's a lot of words. That's a lot of words. I do all that. I'm a Marli. Like, you know, whatever.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:05:41

Like, it's there's other things too. But yeah. There we go.

Marli Williams [: 00:05:45

Yeah. Well, there's there's a few things that I really loved what you said about, you know, it feels like it's been a long time, but almost, like, not a long time. And the only way that you get better at doing anything is by doing the thing. I gave a keynote a couple weeks ago, and there was this shift. And I've been speaking publicly, doing keynotes for 8 years. And there was this moment. I was like, I feel like I'm finally trusting myself. I feel like, you know, in talking about this idea today that we get to explore of owning your voice, owning who you are, owning your authenticity, owning your leadership, leading the room.

Marli Williams [: 00:06:28

With yoga teachers, right, there's this, like, I'm creating a sequence. I'm creating a flow. And my mission is really helping leaders and speakers, facilitators create transformation in people's lives, whether that's through workshops, retreats, programs, experiences, whether you have a minute with somebody, an hour with them, a week with them, that they will leave different than when they came in the room. Whatever room that they walk into with you, they leave different. And I'm excited to talk to you about, like, how, as leaders, how important our voice is when it comes to guiding people and leading people and how to help people own the hell out of their voice so that they can make the impact, so that they can make the difference, so that they can create the transformation. Because I think when we when we hesitate, when we hold back, when we play small, when we shrink, when we try to be someone that we're not, that's when we don't have the ability to make the impact that I think the people that are listening to this podcast wanna make. And whether you are, you know, again, like a manager at a store or you work in health care or you have your own business, there's always these opportunities to up level our leadership. And, today, really talking about, like, what does that mean to you to own the hell out of your voice? How did you come to this? Where where do you begin with people when you're helping them do this? Because I think it's such a powerful invitation for people.

Marli Williams [: 00:08:10

So we'll just dive in there.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:08:12

Last April, I hosted the 1st in person flow school. So when I hosted here in Portland, and I hosted 1 in April, 1 in November, And one of the people that came in April, just meeting her, she walks into the room. We're having this conversation, and she tells me this story about how she kind of was having a little heart to heart with herself. And she told me that she started saying to herself, why not me? A shout out to Sally. And I just think of Sally so often with that where she had to give herself permission to say, look, why not me? And I think as leaders or anybody who's interested in stepping to a space where you're at the front of a room. And yoga is an interesting kind of land because people will find yoga, find the practice, and say, oh, this is, like, life changing. I've created these shifts in my in my world and etcetera, and I wanna learn more about it. Maybe I don't wanna teach, and then all of a sudden, they're teaching and thinking, what the hell have I done? And you get to face all the parts of you.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:09:25

When you're a leader, you are mirrored back by everybody who's in front of you, and you get to face the parts of yourself that you think are not worthy of being in front of the room, that you're like, I'm not enough, or I still have all of my stuff that I'm trying to figure out, or how do I say this thing, or where do I need to learn this, or there's a lot of permission giving we give ourselves. And I love that Sally came to that, and, you know, so my first time, and I and I gotta say that to them. I'm like, you know, as much as you're going into the room and trying to teach something, and sometimes we're teaching new things, and we're thinking, how am I gonna help people do this thing? It's like maybe I've been doing this online, but this is my first time in person, and I'm figuring this out next to you. And so I think as leaders, it becomes a really powerful place to bring people with you and say, we're doing this together, and why not us? Let's do that. And and really giving ourselves permission to maybe be the weirdest one in the room. Because if we're the weirdest and if and if we let ourselves make the weird faces, make weird body noises, mess up, like, correct, redirect, pivot, whatever it is. It helps, I think, give everybody else permission who we might be speaking to, teaching, showing up with to say, maybe it's okay to just be human. Why not me too if they're not, quote, unquote, perfect? Because perfect is boring to me.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:10:47

I don't wanna be perfect. Perfect is boring. So I could I could belong here too because we all wanna belong. That's really what it is.

Marli Williams [: 00:10:55

Yeah. And the the interesting thing is I think that we all want to belong, and we all want to stand out. And that's the spot or, like, the the dance that I think as human beings we play in. And as leaders, like, the the reason I created the podcast, let's lead together, is that leadership can feel lonely. It can be lonely to be in front of the room if we're not in this space of, like, a co created experience of we're in this together. Let's do this together. And that I always tell people that I'm working with no one wants to be told what to do. They want a model of what's possible for them.

Marli Williams [: 00:11:38

And so it's not saying the perfect words in the perfect sequence in the perfect order. It's being the most fully expressed version of you. And it's that expression of you that helps people feel like they belong, and where you stand out, and where you lead. And leadership in a way is saying, like, well, why not me? Because a lot of people don't wanna get in the front of the room because of the who the hell am I story. Like, I don't have enough training, knowledge, certification. And I tell people all the time in trainings, I'm like, no one is going to knight you as an expert. No one's gonna walk around with this. Like, I don't care how many little certifications you have on that wall.

Marli Williams [: 00:12:24

You are the only one who gets to decide that you're qualified. Why not me? If not you, then then who? And if not now, then when? We oftentimes, like, once I have this and that, and this certification, and that training. And if you're listening to this podcast, you are probably, like, a lifelong learner, someone who is always learning and growing, who wants to be better. And I think that there's a way to do both. Own your awesome right now. Own your authority right now, and grow and learn. So it's not an either or. I think if people are like, I declare myself an expert enough in this.

Marli Williams [: 00:13:03

And what makes you an expert is that you are constantly learning and growing and researching and reading and studying the things that you're passionate about. That is what art of what qualifies you to lead. And leadership is about a decision to step in, to step out, to stand out, and to say, like, I'm gonna go first. I'm willing to mess up. I'm willing to look silly. I'm willing to not have it all figured out, but my desire to be of service is greater than my fear. And figuring out, like, how can I show up and serve right now in this moment with this unique constellation of people that are in front of me instead of I have to get it all right? Our ego wants to look good and get it right. Versus, like, what is your unique brand of magic? And what does your voice sound like when it is the most expressed, when you are not holding back, when you are playing full out? And what does it look like? What does it sound like? What does it feel like in your body when you are able to express yourself in a way that, again, feels authentic? Where do you begin with people in helping them own the hell out of their voice and find that authenticity within them so that they can do that, and believe in themselves enough to really, like, own it and share it.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:14:31

I think that a part of this is play. We can get very serious. I mean, this is why I talked about sexy Sunday. This is why part of my intro is like, you know, I have a mom of 3 kids. They are busy. I have a almost 18 year old, a 16 year old, and an almost 13 year old. We're doing things, and this idea that we're more than one thing, and we sometimes box ourselves in and be like, this is the thing I do. So if I'm a yoga teacher, I'm gonna be this thing, but I'm a mom.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:15:01

Actually, being a mom makes me a better teacher, makes me a better leader. I've learned things being a mom that have greatly impacted my ability to show up in the room, have empathy, have patience, have all of the things. And, also, I can talk about sexy Sunday poetry over here and have that. I can talk about high demand religion and coming from that. I can talk about, like, all these different pieces and say, all of these are part of me. I'm gonna show up in the room, and there's actually no way to leave parts of myself out. And I think it's this invitation to play with all of the parts of you and say, I none of those are worth hiding away. They all play a part in the story.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:15:44

And I think in that permission giving of how to own your voice, I think one of it is just letting yourself be more than one thing, and that's a solo experience too. That's an inside kind of exploration, and you can definitely be part of communities that can support you in exploring those things. But where that really is our our self and maybe finding people that we think are doing those things that might encourage us and be like, oh, that person's doing it. Like, why not me? That person's doing it. They're not perfect, and they have more than one thing happening. I have more than one thing happening. I can show up in my version of what is real and what my experiences have been. So I think the the play between all the parts of us, it's an important piece of just, you know, who you are and what your makeup is.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:16:33

And I think, like, that's the internal kind of piece for my world of yoga and movement. Movement is so impactful because you can't do something with your body that doesn't impact your insides. If you think about standing in a wide leg position with your legs far apart and your arms up in the air, your star like, you're at a big star shape, that does something way different for you than if you were to like to curl yourself into a little ball. That feels different inside of your body. And so when I throw myself open and I lift my chest and I lift up and open, like, that is its own experience, and that makes me feel things. And I think movement can be such a powerful tool for us to then be able to tap into play. And as teachers, AKA leaders and business owners, etcetera, there is a lot of work to be done, and there's a lot of BTS, like, behind the scenes that is, like, so mundane. And when somebody's like, well, you know, what are you doing today? And you list one thing, but in your head, you're like, wow.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:17:40

That's 15 things actually I need to do to do this one thing. It's for real. So I, like, try to bring people into saying, like, we're doing something serious here, but we're gonna make it serious play. We're gonna say, if we're so focused on the deliverable and on, like, the impact it has that we forget to connect to it just for ourselves, we are no longer moved, and people are moved when you are moved. If you're not moved by the thing, nobody's gonna care. You have to, like, be living in it. You have to have a connection to it in order for them to find that connection. So all of it loops back to yourself and being like, how can you play with it? Where do you bring that sense of play and passion and pleasure of doing the damn thing? Bring that in.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:18:25

Pull all your parts. Let all

Marli Williams [: 00:18:26

of them exist and play there. This idea of allowing ourselves to play and let go of taking ourselves so seriously around, like, again, looking good and getting it right. The other part about play is, like, where can I explore and experiment? What does this sound like? What does this feel like? Letting ourselves play in the playground of possibility of, oh, I'm gonna try this out. I'm gonna try this out and not feel like there's one way. You know? And there's so many people like, this is the way, and this is the answer, and this is the thing, and this is the training, and this is certification. It's like, I think that this idea of owning the hell out of your voice is finding your way. And how you find that is through iterating, testing things out, and trying things out, and being inspired by others, but also doing that internal work and owning all of the parts of who we are, allowing those things to inform who we are and how we show up in that level of authenticity where I don't have anything to hide. Brene Brown talks about, like, shame lives in the shadows and all these things that we feel like we're having tied or hold back.

Marli Williams [: 00:19:41

If they really knew who I really was, then nobody would like me, listen to me, accept me. And yet, it's all of those parts of who you are is what makes people lean in and listen is when they know who you really are and this willingness to be I think part of owning the hell out of your voice is, are you willing to be seen? And the idea that I share with people is that visibility is vulnerability. And the more visible you are being a leadership position, you might be more visible, which might feel like vulnerability. And that's why I think so many people list public speaking as their number one biggest fear is because this level of exposure. And I think it's kinda playing in, like, well, if I expose myself first, here's my skeletons, here's my shadows, here's the fears, here's the doubts. I don't have anything to hide. And when we learn to love and embrace and accept those parts of ourselves that maybe we have banished, we have shunned ourselves for, we've made ourselves wrong about. Again, owning your voice is this level of integrating all of the parts of who you are and coming into this, like, full love and acceptance and embodiment of not just the bright, shiny parts that people see, like the highlight reel, but it's embracing all of the nuances, all the layers, the struggles, the challenges, the beautiful moments, the challenging moments that make us human, and it is our humanness that connects us more than the perfection.

Marli Williams [: 00:21:29

I agree with you. Being perfect is boring. Nobody wants that. If we can learn to really embrace all of who we are. But I think we only want people to see the best and not the whole.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:21:44

People are terrified of that. I think we're all terrified of that in some way. We're like, I'm not really that big of a deal of just like everybody else here, but I really believe that we each have different things that we offer to each other, and it's one of the reasons why I think in the yoga world, there's a lot of different teachers. There can be a set number of poses, right, where we say, okay. A a warrior too is a warrior 2, and why do we need more than one of us to teach this? And there's a different way that each of us do it. And I I talk a lot when I am working with teachers and and mentorship and 1 on 1 mentorship or in flow school that the magic is in the transition time, because warrior 2 is the posture. Right? And there can be a very traditional way that things are taught, etcetera, but how you get into and out of it is its own thing. How do people enter a room and then before you start the class, like, what's that transition? What's that middle place? Like, where is the places that you personalize your practice, not just as a student, but as a leader where you personalize it with your own flavor? I think that's why we're all needed is because there's a different way that we do that.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:22:56

On top of, of course, we all have a different energy, and some people we're super drawn to, and some people we're repelled by, and that's totally fine. That's also why we need more than 1 bus. And it's way too much pressure to say, like, I'm the person for everybody in the world. I do not want that. I do not want that. That is way too much. I wanna be for the people that are I'm for, and somebody else is gonna be for the people that works for. And each of us are here, and I I really think of us as a circle and where a circle doesn't lift up.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:23:25

Like, we can't, like, lift that circle. It's gonna be wonky if everybody does it different at different points, but we really lift it together. And we create something that cannot exist when there's more than one type of person here, and we serve a whole community where there's a bunch of different personalities and needs and interests and and everything in that. So teachers, leaders, everybody say, like, well, how do I personalize this experience? And and like you're saying, you know, I think all the the parts of us where it is scary to be seen, and there's an element to public speaking for yoga teachers that is really terrifying for for everybody. And I've had my own fear journey in that. What you see now is so not what existed. Like, so not what existed. It's been such a big learning to own my voice, and I think that's part of why I say it now is because my willingness to be brave and curious and to step into the space of experimenting and saying, like, I'm just gonna throw this out there, and let's see what happens.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:24:32

It's terrifying, and you have to learn how to hold yourself. You have to learn how to befriend the parts of yourself that maybe you think aren't important or shouldn't be shared or, like, are too much or not enough or whatever it is, and and walk yourself into the new version of yourself, and we're always doing that. And so I think, really, when I'm working with people, it's there's nothing about it that's fast, and there's nothing about it that has to be rushed. You're just gonna be where you're gonna be, and keep leaning in. That's really what it's about.

Marli Williams [: 00:25:06

And that that's such beautiful permission to give people. I think so many people, we want we wanna fast track it. Give me the blue pill that's gonna make me a confident speaker, you know, or whatever it is. And I joke that, like, the point of life isn't like to get to the end as fast as possible. The point is how can we grow? How can we learn? And what are we willing to kind of risk, or step into, or be to move through that fear? And again, I don't think the fear ever goes away. It's just that we learn to dance with it. And I have these mantras as a speaker and as a leader. It's like, okay.

Marli Williams [: 00:25:46

And I get those, you know, the butterflies, the anticipation, and I can harness that now in a way of my mission today is, like, I'm gonna show up and serve, and I'm gonna show up and I'm gonna play full out, and I'm gonna give it all that I have. Show up and serve, play full out. Because when I'm coming from a place of service, I think that helps me get out of that ego, like, get it right, look good. And if this changed one person's life, if this podcast changed one person needs to hear this because I think it's like, oh, I wanna serve I know that I meant to serve millions of people. How I serve one person is how I'm gonna serve millions of people. Right? And so it's can I be present enough and connected enough to my heart and to being of service rather than the perfection looking good, getting it right? And I think that that helps ground me. And, again, I think it's it's a muscle that we build. I think that some people think it's either a skill that you have or you don't have.

Marli Williams [: 00:26:46

And when we see people in the front of the room owning their voice, when you see the people on the TED talk given the TED talks, it's like they woke up, They were born that way. They've never been scared in their life. And because they allude this level of confidence. And and people, I'm sure, say that to you. People say that to me. Like, I just wanna be there now. I wanna have that energy or I wanna have that confidence, but the only way is through. And, you know, I've been doing this professionally for 8 years, and then, you know, 10 years before that, I was teaching and leading in other ways, sometimes those memories pop up on Facebook.

Marli Williams [: 00:27:26

I'm like, that was 10 years ago that I gave my first keynote. And it's like, I have been on this journey for a while. And people that are just starting out, they wanna be good right now. And it's like, are you willing to be in the arena and get your butt kicked a little bit and fall down and get muddy and but can you do it in a playful way? Sometimes when I'm taking myself way too seriously, I'm like, it's not a kidney in a cooler. Meaning, like, I'm not about to go do open heart surgery. Like, the other funny one that I say. And this you know, just bringing the humor in. It's like, even my worst workshop or my worst shop or my worst talk could change someone's life.

Marli Williams [: 00:28:06

It's not that I want it to be my worst. I don't want it to be bad, but it's not ever gonna be perfect. And I'm always reiterating. I'm always refining what landed, what didn't land, what could be better, what the talk that I just gave where I was like, man, I feel like I'm really trusting myself. I'm like, oh my gosh. I feel like this is the talk, and this is the message. But I I've had to give this talk a bunch of times to get to this place, and this is about kind of owning the hell out of your voice. I have one slide in this keynote, and it just says, are you willing, as a leader to bring the weather? And bringing the weather is really about owning the room, owning your voice, showing up, playing full out, bringing the weather is like you walk in and people are they're complaining.

Marli Williams [: 00:28:52

They're negative. There's a negative energy going on, and it's like, am I willing to show up as a leader and create a different energy, create a different environment to set the tone, to set the temperature? This is the arena that we get to play in. The reason I say that is, like, I've never had, like, here, I have my signature talk. I think that people think like, oh, if I had my thing, if I knew my message, then I would own my voice. Again, kind of this the only way is through, and the clarity that you seek is a result of the action that you take. And so the more action that you take and, like, the more that you're in the arena is when you're going to build that muscle of self trust, of confidence. It's like you are doing reps. Tony Robbins, you know, when he first started speaking, he was like, he would speak anywhere and everywhere, 3 to 4 times a day when most people were speaking 3 to 4 times a year or once a month.

Marli Williams [: 00:29:54

Let's just say you picked up the guitar and you played it once a month. It's probably gonna take a long time to learn it. Right? And same with, like, owning your voice, how often are you really doing it? And even in moments when it you're not in the front of the room, every place is a playground and a practice ground for you to use your voice, own your voice, whether it's in a meeting with your family, with your friends. Again, where and when do you feel like you're in your power, or when are you hiding, shrinking, or holding back?

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:30:29

I love that you brought up repetition because there's such a big piece of that within the yoga world that I talk about because I've worked with a lot people who are Vinyasa yoga teachers. So for those people who are not aware of, like, yoga, there's ashtanga is a pretty old practice and that's been around for a long time. There's a set sequence. Bikram, there's a set sequence. Baptiste yoga, there's a set sequence. There's a lot of practices that have set sequences of what you do. Vinyasa is this flow land that stems from and originates from Ashtanga. It branched off of that.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:30:59

So there is often a there's a lot of sun citations in it, sun a, sun bs. There's, like, a standing warrior theories that they call it, and there's often kind of a a way that people do it for Vinyasa, because it really stemmed from another practice that was very set, but Vinyasa is less set and constantly changes. So it's interesting because Vinyasa teachers take it on themselves to feel a lot of pressure to constantly have to change and not repeat things outside of the sun a, sun b, where Vinyasa, as a translation from Sanskrit, is a special way to place something. It is the transitions. It is that space between things, and there's so much room to play with that and flow school. Like, the more that I do this, the more that I am, like, helping other teachers and trying to create language around what we're doing, why. And I bring movement science. I mix it with the tradition of yoga, and we're like, okay.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:31:55

We're gonna and add breath and add dance. Like, it's not dance, but, like, people will be like, this feels like a yoga dance. It is the postures, but we are doing it in a different way, and we have a solid why of why we're doing it with a blueprint that's personalizable, and it is different than what a Vinyasa class typically is that you walk into. So with that, the people, teachers are having to face doing something different and owning their voice in that, but also we talk about repetition. And if teachers are constantly switching what their class is, they are not practicing saying the things. So it's kind of a an interesting thing for the yoga world for Vinyasa in particular where I tell people, I'm like, if you're gonna teach 3 times a week, I want you to go into your class and say, okay, y'alls. This week, we are gonna have the exact same class Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. We are gonna move from what we're doing, and what poses we're doing, where on the mat we are, to how we're doing it.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:33:02

So the 1st day on Monday, like today, it's Monday, we're really gonna, like, dive into what we're doing. And then we're gonna start leaning into how as we move throughout the week, and you'll come back and be like, oh, yeah. That's right. Oh, we're doing that. Okay. Yeah. Now how do we actually really transition and be in those places? So that by Friday, we're gonna put it all together. You're not gonna know exactly what it is.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:33:23

It's gonna land in your body. We're gonna move it with the breath. Throughout each of these days, you really get to feel it. And so in that way, creating this new language around repetition so, like, I'm so on board with you with repetition, but for the yoga land in particular for your vinyasa, people don't. And then as teachers, I'm like, well, of course, it feels hard every single time because you're teaching trying to teach something new every time. And when it's the first time we're doing something, it's shitty. It really isn't good. If you're a noob, you're a beginner once, and it is beginner land, and it is a party.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:34:02

Same for me. Like, if I teach something brand new the first time, I'm looking at my notes more. I'm like, okay. What am I doing? How am I doing it? But you have to do the first one. You have to do the first one when it feels uncomfortable, when you're not quite sure in order to get to the one where you're like, I don't even have to look at my notes, and I can just be in this flow as a leader. And so my encouragement to teachers say, like, okay. If you teach 3 times a week, great. If you teach once a week, teach that same class for an entire month.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:34:29

People are not even thinking about it. So, like, go back and teach it again. You, the repetition, and then I have them repeat in class too. I'm like, the repetition helps not only the students feel to drop it into their body. It helps you as a teacher be able to own it and drop it into you and your body, your knowledge, your ability to deliver. So your confidence in your voice is going to increase because you are putting in the reps. So absolutely.

Marli Williams [: 00:34:56

It's so true. And I don't think I've ever given the same exact keynote more than once, to be honest. It might be similar content, but it's getting on stage, whether it's in a room of 5 people, 10 people, hundreds of people. Anytime you are in the front of the room, owning your voice, you are putting in those reps. And, again, there's these opportunities. Like, I've slowly started to be like, okay. I'm gonna I'm gonna play with this message and give it over and over a few times. It allows me to refine.

Marli Williams [: 00:35:30

And I don't think that I've been in a place where I've been able to play in that refinement. I think my first speaker coach, he said, Marli, your first 100 talks are gonna suck. And he's like, hopefully, they're not gonna suck to your audience, but they're gonna suck to you Because we wanna be there and deliver from that place because we're so terrified of, like, sucking. Brene Brown, she has a great podcast, the FFT. She talks about the fucking first time you do anything and how we think it should be, like, the 100th time. What happens is that a lot of people let themselves off the hook because they don't feel ready. They don't feel prepared. And then they're like, I'm never doing that again.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:36:20

It's interesting. I I've shared about storytelling. I think there's such a way to story tell within the yoga space, and I call it storytelling, not theming or intention setting. I'd I'd like it as story, and it can look like a lot of different things, but I had somebody, you know, comment that, well, I can do this in a kid's yoga class. But doing this with adults, like, they don't know about that. Right? Leaning into the audience that is in front of you, it can be really terrifying. And and I think about there's another person that reached out to me and hasn't DM'd me on Instagram before, but sent me a message, and I was there, and I can't always answer everything. But this person left this message and was so distraught in saying, I just taught a class, and the manager was there, and the studio was there, and all these teachers were there.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:37:14

And I felt like I was gonna do the thing, but then the class was terrible, and I kept on messing up. And I was my voice was shaking, and I didn't do the right thing here, and I had to keep looking at my notes, and I felt so out of my whole body and experience, and I felt so stressed. And I think I just ruined it all and just feeling so overwhelmed. And I love this person, you know, later, like, I don't know. I just like in this moment. I was like, oh, I'm just gonna message Bonnie. And I was like, great. I was like, well, thanks for messaging me.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:37:46

You know? Again, like, a brand new person where I was able to I sent her some voice messages, and I was like, you know what? You're doing good. And it is okay for this to feel uncomfortable. It is okay that you're feeling like this right now, and that doesn't mean that it was terrible or not terrible. It's just okay, and I really want you to give yourself permission to let that be okay for a minute. And also, if you were shaky, if you were messing up, if you were all those things, those teachers know. They know what it's like to be at the front of the room, and they don't expect you to be perfect. They don't expect you to have, like, all the things in order. And, actually, you know, one of the things I end up suggesting to her is, like, teach that exact same class again.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:38:32

The next time you're gonna teach, I want you to teach the exact same thing you already taught, teach it again. I want you to, like, put it back in your body and do it, and and she has done that. But I think it you know, we are afraid to fail in front of each other. And, you know, you had already used the word experiment, but I call everything an experiment.

Marli Williams [: 00:38:49

Just give it a go. And it takes some of that pressure. Anytime you're you're feeling like you're putting all of this pressure on yourself for it to be perfect, I think one of the invitations for you today is where can you play more? Where can you let go? Where can you be curious? Where can you just say, like, I'm just gonna try this out. Are you willing to try something out with me? Like, let's do something together. I you know, if you're if you're in a workshop, sometimes even in a keynote, I'm like, I've never done this with a group this size before. Are you willing to do something totally wild with me? Invite them into the journey with you, and it's like, we're gonna try this out. We're gonna try this on instead of, like, first time that I do this workshop or this event or I teach this class. It's gotta be perfect.

Marli Williams [: 00:39:38

Let go of that pressure and that perfection. My hope from our conversation today is that people have permission to own who they are so that they can own their voice and share it with their people in whatever way that that looks like for them, whether that's on a stage, virtually, with your family, as a yoga teacher, as a speaker, as a coach. Where can you allow yourself that opportunity for that full expression instead of perfection? Do you have any final thoughts for folks listening today, things that they can take with them, and where people can find you and learn more about you and your work in the world?

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:40:20

Yeah. Final thoughts would be, I wanna give one note on you're saying the full expression. I think sometimes the saying full expression can feel daunting. Because I think even this morning, I'm waking up and thinking, like, who the hell am I now today? And so I think full expression is, like, also the asterisk of who are you today? Happy birthday. Like, this is your new day. I'll say, like, not fullest expression of, like, your whole human existence built today. What you can be and who you are and and what you can hold in delivery. So those asterisk note for that.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:40:54

I think one other thing I'd share is the phrase that I heard a bit ago that has stuck with me that what happens if you don't show up, and what happens to the people when you don't show up, and who is impacted when you don't show up? With this idea that if you don't show up in the room, what changes or what doesn't change? And that you're needed in that transformation and transition and expansion and permission giving for other people. And you might never know the impact that you have, and you think you just totally fucked it up. But what happens if you don't show up? Right? And there are people that their lives aren't shifted. They don't have the ahas. They don't have and, yes, they are existing without you and are totally, you know, autonomous and great. But, also, what happens if you don't do it? And that oomph of, like, we need each other. We really need each other. So

Marli Williams [: 00:41:53

I love that so much. That's so good. And where can the people learn more about you, what you're up to, and find all the things?

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:42:02

My website is bonnieweeks.com. So you can go there, find a bunch of things. You can find me on Instagram @Icarrot_bowl_bonnie. Like, the Super Bowl, but a bowl of carrots. I thought I was gonna be a food blogger, and then I am not, but I've kept it. It's Careful Bonnie. Like, this is what it is.

Marli Williams [: 00:42:19

I love it. It's so good.

Bonnie Weeks [: 00:42:20

So those would be probably the easiest places to find initial connection, and then there's all the different ways, mentorship, flow school, practice with me, listen to podcasts, like, all the things, but, that's a good place to begin.

Marli Williams [: 00:42:33

Beautiful. Beautiful. Well, thank you so much for being here today and for having this powerful conversation around helping people own the hell out of their voice. I wanna come back to that thing that you said of reminding people, like, why not you? So go out there, show up, serve, play full out, and remember to have some fun along the way. Don't take yourself too seriously. All right, everybody. Until next time. Take care.

Marli Williams [: 00:43:00

Peace. Thank you for joining us on another inspiring episode of the Marli Williams podcast. We hope you're leaving here with renewed energy and valuable insights to fuel your leadership, coaching, and speaking endeavors. I'd love to invite you to subscribe, rate, and review this podcast to help us reach more aspiring leaders and speakers like you. We have more exciting episodes and remarkable guests lined up, so make sure to tune in next time. Until then, keep leading with purpose, coaching with heart, and speaking with conviction. This is Marli Williams signing off. See you next week.